Cultural things around Melbourne we’re keen to do and see

We started one post for today, then realised we had to wait for more information, then we started ANOTHER post, but it was food-related and we both had bad experiences with lunch.

So here’s TAKE THREE, museum and gallery exhibitions which intrigue us, and other cultural thingos we’re looking forward to.

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Museum shops of the world: the Koorie Heritage Trust — plus the Moving Tongues exhibit

Yesterday was shockingly windy, but I had to leave the house for a Continuum programming meeting (aka eating a steak sandwich with a friend while we made plans and took notes and scribbled things like “THIS PANEL CANNOT RUN WITHOUT MAJORITY ASIAN PANELISTS” in our spreadsheets).

And since I was in the city anyway, I managed to knock some places off my to-do-one-day list: the Koorie Heritage Trust, and the Moving Tongues exhibit at the City Library.

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Asian Ghost-ery Store

agsSteph has taken advantage of having a blog to interview her friend Vidya, who has a show, Asian Ghost-ery Store, starting this very week at Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

So today Steph and Vidya talk talcum powder, ambiguity, ghosts, and the comfort of the Asian grocery store.

The show blurb:

Raised in the aisles of Asian grocery stores, time has come for Shan and Yaya to escape — and haunt modern Australia. But how do a couple of ghosts conjure a stylish, post-racial image while stuffing their faces with Hello Panda? Shannan Lim and Vidya Rajan glide you through a late-night trolley ride of story, performance, sketch and meandering rumination. Part truthful, part ball of lies, Asian Ghost-ery Store is an exorcism — a dark yet gleeful shopping spree of their shared consciousness.

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The Lost + Rare Trades Fair

Over the weekend, Liz piled into a car with some Friends of No Award and also Friends of Friends of No Award, and headed out to Kyneton (coincidentally the hometown of Stephanie’s most embarrassing celebrity crush) for the Lost + Rare Trades Fair (and also embarrassing celebrity crush sighting).

(Steph went to the National Steam Centre instead of Kyneton; she has this celebrity crush business UNDER CONTROL)

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Rare No Award Art Post: Narnia and the Inner North AU – Spring Racing Carnival Shenanigans

1.  On a slow Monday in 2013, a bunch of friends and I conceived a Narnia AU (that’s alternate universe, for those of you not steeped in fandom lingo) where Narnia is Melbourne’s inner north and its denizens are basically hipsters.

1a. The question is not whether or not Reepicheep owns a fedora, but how many fedoras he owns.

2.  Melbourne is currently in the grips of the Spring Racing Carnival, that time of year when we have a public holiday to get dressed up, wear silly hats and drink champagne (yay!) and also lots of horses die because horse racing is terrible (not yay!)

1 + 2 = 3.  Shasta and Aravis have something to say about this.

narnia_cupday_smaller

(As a result of this piece, I was asked to do the Narnian hipsters’ Tinder profiles.  I’m still contemplating that, but I am 100% certain that Lucy is one of those girls whose cat features heavily in her profile.)

(He is not a tame housecat.)

secret linkspam

Super important Fatberg update: Wet wipes cause massive issues for regional drainage systems.

Mr Raff said body corporate and property owners were footing bills of between $800-$1000 for the installation of cameras down drains in unit housing to determine who is responsible for clogging drains, should the problem arise.

Cameras to look at who is flushing wet wipes!  We hope the cameras are in the drains, not in the bathrooms.

Jax Jacqui Brown (well known Melbourne queer + disability activist) let down by VLine. Train shame: Disability advocate forced to sit in space reserved for luggage

Steph feels like the magic is gone, and it’s Buzzfeed’s fault: We Found The Guy Behind Australia’s Greatest Ever Meme.

Netball: The sport America invented, then lost.  Liz has a lot of complicated feelings about netball, mostly because it was compulsory for girls at her primary school, and the teachers just assumed everyone knew the rules.  Plus, she was tall (yes, really!) and much better at basketball.  However, netball as a cultural artifact is really interesting!

Derailing for Dummies.

What happens when cyclists actually obey all the road rules, haha, suck it.

Steph is having a lot of feelings about this tumblr thread on hippies as racism (which she agrees with, fyi, it’s just helped solidify some feels).

How snobbery helped take the spice out of European cooking. TELL STEPH ALL YOUR FOOD HISTORY FEELS.

The ‘N’ word through the ages: The ‘madness’ of HP Lovecraft. In case you didn’t know how racist he was.  (No Award’s new WordPress theme is called Lovecraft, because Liz was tickled at the idea of calling out our own theme as problematic.)

Liz went to MONA on the weekend!  Her feelings ranged from “Meh” to “Dislike”, with occasional pauses for things she actually liked.  Here is an article from 2012 that partially sums up her feelings.  The comments are also worth reading.

(MONA is not a great place to visit if you are asexual, have triggers relating to graphic depictions of rape, or have issues around cruelty to animals.  I mention this because it didn’t come up in any of my pre-trip reading, and I personally would have liked some warning.  Also, I can’t figure out why people were upset about the blunt knife in this piece, when the real issue is that the bowl is too shallow and the fish are hanging out in their own excrement.)

On the upside, I have yet to produce a museum review as terrible as this one.

Huw Parkinson of the ABC has found his calling: Australian politics and pop culture mash-ups.  The only aspect of this Bronwyn-Bishop-as-Lucille-Bluth clip is that Tony Abbott isn’t Gob.

On a related note, Friend of No Award Ash has drawn our attention to a highlight of Bishop’s Wikipedia page:

Bishop was educated at Roseville Public School, completing her primary education in 1954. Bishop undertook a five-year LL.B. program at the University of Sydney. However, she was deemed ineligible to continue after failing a number of subjects multiple times. Bishop failed a total of 11 subjects over six years. In her first year in 1960, she failed all four core subjects. In 1964, she failed four subjects again and repeated them in 1965, in which she failed three again. The policy of the University of Sydney at the time was that a student was required to show cause why they should be allowed to repeat a subject for a third time, and Bishop was deemed ineligible to continue.

…Bishop first worked as an articled clerk and played an acting role as a barrister in the 1960s Australian television program Divorce Court.

Finally, Liz had one ongoing problem in Tasmania: the underwire of her bra kept popping out and trying to stab her.  But Google has provided a solution!  (No, it’s not “don’t wear bras without underwires”.  They don’t exist in my size, and aside from the occasional stabbing, I prefer the support that comes with a bit of metal in one’s undergarments.)

This link has “borrowed” content and gender essentialism, but it also has more useful illustrations than the original source: How To Repair An Underwire Bra, featuring cheap corn/bunion pads.