national day of action: stop the forced closure of remote indigenous communities

On March 19, 2015 By StephanieIn australia

subtitle: more things to hate your government for. actually the same reasons as last week, but here is some action.

There are protests all over the country today for a National Day Of Action. If you can’t make it to a physical protest, or even if you can, you can also participate virtually.

Follow the SOS Blak Australia twitter, and #SOSBlakAustralia.

hashtag lifestyle choices

On March 12, 2015 By StephanieIn australia, Uncategorized1 Comment

On the same day as Tony Abbott announced a decision to close more than 100 remote indigenous communities, he compounded injury with insult (literally) by justifying this move as the defunding of a ‘lifestyle choice’.

To live on Country is obviously not a lifestyle choice. To live on Country is a right and a responsibility and also, get your goddamn white man shoes off the land.

Here are some Indigenous voices:

Utopiana: Parliament House is an unviable political community.

At the ABC an article that has a lot of quotes from people, including this truthy beauty:

The chairman of WA’s Kimberley community of Djarindjin, Brian Lee, said it was a cultural obligation to live on traditional country and it could not be a “lifestyle choice”

“We are obliged to look after our country and that’s why a lot of us are out here on country,” Mr Lee said.

“Unless you live out here, you really can’t make any judgement on that.

It’s not that hard a concept. Even if you move it away from cultural stuff (you shouldn’t), it’s still about a sense of place and stewardship of the land, and how are we still in a place where white people think their science is always right; their politics is always right; their traditions are always right?

By Kate Galloway and temporarily outside the paywall at the Alternative Law Journal, Indigenous dispossession in the 21st Century: The Northern Frontier.

I say this a lot but are you following Luke Pearson and/or Indigenous X? Luke is thoughtful and excellent, and Indigenous X is a different Indigenous voice every week and every voice is amazing.

#lifestylechoice

Not Indigenous voices, but excellent, at SBS Comedy: Indigenous Australians Still Not Thrilled About ‘Lifestyle Choice’ To Take Their Land.

Reports from various Indigenous leaders indicate that first Australians are still not thrilled about colonisers making the ‘lifestyle choice’ to steal their land and kill their people.

Though understanding it was the invader’s personal decision, Indigenous elders noted that the cost of being systematically oppressed greatly outweighed the benefits, namely due to there being no benefits.

“It certainly is a lifestyle choice,” said one indigenous elder. “Some people want to become plumbers, some want to be electricians, some want to attempt to steal sovereignty from a native people.

things i can do because they’re not specified in my lease

On February 24, 2015 By StephanieIn links, lists in all caps, politics

in uni, a friend’s lease specified ‘no ironing on the carpet.’

things that aren’t specified ‘not to do’ in my lease:

install a door from the garage into the house

via a tunnel

data retention

install a pool in the courtyard

just a little one

keep penguins

keep a squid in the swimming pool

call for the resignation of the president of the Human Rights Commissioner because I don’t like how she mentioned I’m breaking some human rights

Gillian Triggs: It was the first time in my career that anyone has ever asked for my resignation.

Penny Wong:

Q: Were you shocked by this proposition?

Gillian Triggs: I was deeply shocked.

Triggs is telling the committee the secretary of AGD suggested to her a new position would be found if she’d vacate her spot at the Human Rights Commission.

Triggs: It was definitely said to me that an offer would be made for me to provide work for the government in areas of my expertise in international law.

(This is amazing. Truly.)

sorry where was i

break human rights

make demands of a sovereign nation because i gave them some cash when they were in a lot of trouble

actually my parents’ friends’ aunt gave them the money

but i thought about it

iron on the carpet

bronze on the carpet

install an ai to do all my stuff

fill my house with bees

replace all the windows with linux

(it’s a type of glass)

be nice to strangers

invasion day needs a linkspam

On January 26, 2015January 11, 2016 By StephanieIn links

You may know it as Survival Day, or a public holiday for celebrating a genocide.

Nakkiah Lui writes at the Guardian: Australia Day is a time for mourning, not celebration.

Eugenia Flynn at Crikey: Friend or Foe of Indigenous Culture? Jessica Mauboy as Australia Day Poster Girl.

The day I don’t feel Australian? That would be Australia Day. Chelsea Bond over at The Conversation.

Glen LeLievre - Nothing But Bush — Glen LeLievre – Nothing But Bush

Over the weekend there was some shit going down in the #DearWhitePeople tag, with a whole heap of American (including African-American) policing of Australian Indigenous identities. (It is still pretty anger-making in there, and it sucks for @ebswearspink) I hope that there will be some write ups or something, but it’s not something Steph feels qualified to talk about (though an aside: this is in large part why No Award exists. Because we hate being forced to work through a USA social justice paradigm).

If you’re in Melbourne, Steph is going to some Invasion Day stuff:

There’s a smoking ceremony in the Tianjin Gardens at 10, and then a rally and march from 10:30 from Parliament house, because January 26 is a day of mourning and resistance. This rally is a resistance to colonialism and genocide.

Following that, there’s a festival in Treasury Gardens – Share the Spirit. It’s a festival to celebrate indigenous Australian culture and tradition.

Steph says: There’s rallies all over the country. Please go to one. We are living on indigenous land. I grew up on Noongar land, and I’m living on Wurudgeri land. My personal ancestors might not have had anything to do with the genocides of years past, but by staying silent I contribute to everything that continues. It is the very least I can do.

An audio history of Gough Whitlam

On October 21, 2014October 21, 2014 By StephanieIn music, politics9 Comments

It’s Time

At least he asked permission, unlike some prime ministers.

Gough – The Whitlams

I’ve got a song about a man called Gough.

From Little Things Big Things Grow – Kev Carmody and Paul Kelly

The Native Title decision was due to the amazingness of Vincent Lingiari and the Wave Hill mob. But after decades of racism and genocide by the Australian Government, as evidenced by its disgusting behaviour, it was significant that Gough Whitlam, then Prime Minister, exchanged a handful of sand with Vincent Lingiari.

It’s Time from Keating

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0HzI3lOVdI

Not sung by Gough, but a demonstration of how Gough influenced those Labor prime ministers who followed him, and symbolic of his legacy. Under his government Australia gained Legal Aid, free university education, no-fault divorce and universal health care. His government abolished the death penalty for federal crimes, and conscription. He established the National Employment and Training Scheme, the Family Law Act, the Aboriginal Land Fund Commission, and Environment.

EDITED TO ADD

The beginning is the end, also from Keating, feat. the ghost of Gough

(thanks to DanniP for the reminder)

Please add your other reminders in the comments.

The NSW Parliament welcomes the Sydney Opera House seal; recommends a criminal lawyer, proving the NSW parliament doesn’t understand how migration works

On October 15, 2014 By StephanieIn politics3 Comments

Yesterday, Tuesday 14 October, the NSW Parliament took time out from being massively corrupt to welcome the Sydney Harbour Seal to Sydney Harbour. And also to recommend a criminal lawyer in case it, too, is massively corrupt.

[SYDNEY OPERA HOUSE SEAL

THE Hon. Dr PETER PHELPS [10.47 p.m.]: On behalf of the New South Wales Parliament I welcome welcome the Sydney Opera House seal to Sydney Harbour and look forward to its continued presence over many years to come. Should it ever need a criminal lawyer I strongly recommend Andrew Tiedt.

Question-That this House do now adjourn-put and resolved in the affirmative.

Motion agreed to.

The House adjourned at 10.47 p.m. until 11.00 a.m. on Wednesday 15 October 2014]

A three year old New Zealand fur seal has been hanging out on the steps of the Sydney Opera House for a few weeks. When it first arrived the New South Welsh police were called (because Sydney, I guess), but it was officially welcomed by the New South Wales Parliament yesterday and also recommended to a criminal lawyer.

This is clearly a misleading recommendation as, if anything, the seal will require a migration agent. However given the current state of Australia’s immigration climate, the recommendation of a criminal lawyer may not be completely remiss.

Further complicating matters, and in long-standing tradition, Australia has already claimed the New Zealand seal for itself, naming it the Sydney Opera House Seal despite it clearly being a Kiwi. We expect the seal will be lounging around and claiming the dole shortly.

Letters to NA, the Prime Ministerial Edition

On September 22, 2014September 22, 2014 By StephanieIn politics

Dear No Award,

The Governor-General is avoiding me and I just caught Malcolm Fraser measuring the curtain rods in the Lodge. Is this a sign from the universe that I should totally go ahead and borrow money from those totally-not-shady Middle Eastern dudes?

Yours, Gough

Dear No Award,

I really love swimming, but my staff think I go too often. Do they really care about my health, or are they just being ninnies?

Yours, H.H.

Dear No-Award,

The PM won’t return my calls and is pretending that we didn’t pinky-swear about the PMship in Kirribilli that one time. How do I make him step aside?

Yours faithfully,

Dear No Award,

I have a plan for fighting the Depression, which is an excellent plan, and much better than the Melbourne Plan, which is silly because it comes from Melbourne not Sydney. In the event that the Governor of NSW sacks me, would you recommend getting the NSW Police to fight the army?

Sincerely, Jack Lang, The Big Fella

Dear No-Award,

The PM won’t return my calls and is pretending that we didn’t pinky-swear about the PMship in Kirribilli that one time. How do I make him step aside?

Yours faithfully,

No Award 亲爱的，如果我被解雇，几年可以败坏而且我的替补员还有我的政党，因此摧毁，好不好？K07

[Dear No Award,

In the event that I’m fired, is it reasonable to spend the next few years undermining my replacement and my party, leaving it in a shambles?

K07]

Dear NA,

Are you there, God? It’s me, Tony.

Dear No Award,

There’s no possibility that history will judge my government’s policy of limiting immigration to white people, is there?

Yours faithfully,

Edmund Barton

** GILLARD STATUES UNVEILING CANBERRA

Dear No-Award,

My opposition to the Japanese racial equality proposal at the Paris peace conference after WWI won’t have any lasting repercussions for Australia, will it? I’m pretty confident about this one, ngl.

Best,

Billy “That Pestiferous Varmint” Hughes

Dear No Award,

Look, I just think that Hitler guy isn’t so bad. Sure, he invaded Poland, but who needs Poland? Nazism has its good points, though it’s all a bit too foreign and weird. Do you think I should keep urging England to keep on appeasing Germany?

Hugs and kisses,

RMenz

PS, I’ve been thinking about using nuclear weapons to dredge harbours. That couldn’t have any side effects, could it? Best.

Dear No Award,

Some dickhead keeps lighting lanterns on hills in Bathurst. Is there anything I can do to stop the bastard?

Cheers

Ben Chifley

Dear No Award,

I really want to become Australia’s most effective yet least popular Pri Prime Minister Julia Gillard and Governor General Quentin Bryce toast the Centenary of Canberra. Photo: Andrew Meares stolen from the SMH webpage me Minister yet. Should I start by being a woman or calling the Opposition Leader a misogynist in parliament?

All the best, Julia

Dear No Award,

It looks like there’s going to be a war, and I’m feeling a bit neglected by HH. Thinking about hooking our great nation to that charming Roosevelt inspite of the objections of a whole lot of losers. I’m also going to introduce unpopular but socially and racially progressive politics during a time of upheaval. This can’t end badly, can it?

Best Regards,

John Curtin

Bonus Premiers:

Dear NA,

Someone seems to be coming along in the middle of the night and smashing up all the heritage buildings in Brisbane. Unfortunately, the noise attracts protesters. How many cracked skulls will shut that nonsense down?

JBP

Dear No Award,

I’m worried my legacy won’t uphold itself after I’ve gone. I’d really like to build something in my image, that really speaks to me. I love my mancave back in my house, so what about giving the state a really gigantic shed?

Love lots, Jeff.

Dear NA,

I can’t recall.

Carmen

And here’s the thing that started it all:

Royal Commission resumes

Former PM Gillard has returned to the witness box, where she’s facing questions over renovations she made on her home in 1993 – allegedly funded by money from the union slush fund.

Gillard has just told the commission that she went to Queensland for a holiday, and that while she was away, her then-boyfriend Bruce Wilson “commenced with a group of friends demolishing the bathroom”.

Gillard had apparently been talking about renovating the bathroom for months. “BruceWilson obviously thought I should get on with it and created circumstances where I had to get on with it,” she said.

“By the time I came back the bathroom had been demolished so I had no option but to get the rest of the renovations done.”

To which NA respectfully replies: dump that bastard, and you too can become PM of Australia.

This post was constructed with assistance from noted Fatberg Zoe (again. She’s pretty gold).

things your government has been doing

On July 31, 2014July 30, 2014 By StephanieIn politics, Uncategorized3 Comments

UGH, AUSPOL. Why must you be the blurst? Anyway, to keep you up to date on reasons to hate our federal government, here’s a summary of some things over the last week. Don’t worry, there’s more.

Proposed Changes to the Dole

I HOPE YOU AREN’T ON THE DOLE, not because you’re lazy (you’re not) or undeserving (your government should support you), but because of the proposed job applying thingy. If you’re on Newstart or Work for the Dole, you might be applying for 40 jobs a month. “What we want to do is to motivate job seekers to leave no stone unturned in the pursuit of a job,” Assistant Minister for Employment Luke Hartsuyker said, because people who are long term unemployed are definitely doing it on purpose. Excitingly, Eric Abetz, actual Employment Minister, admits that this might mean employers are spammed with fake, insincere, inconvenient job applications. But I am sure he is just being over-cautious.

Excellently, Centrelink won’t help you do selection criteria for jobs because it takes too long! And someone has handily put together this guide for applying for 40 jobs as quickly as possible.

157 Tamil Asylum Seekers Not on a Boat

157 asylum seekers have been stuck on a boat for a month (thanks, Customs, for keeping us safe), but have finally been allowed to get off the bloody boat. Scott Morrison says this is only because India wants to interview them and take them back, not because he is stopping his very important task of turning back the boats. This might not actually be legal? Who knows anymore. Scott Morrison says the Tamil asylum seekers are ‘economic migrants’ from India which suggests he doesn’t really know a lot about Sri Lanka and India and Tamils, which doesn’t surprise me at all. Even the Indian High Commissioner to Australia, Biren Nanda, says Tamil people living in Indian refugee camps usually aren’t actually citizens of Indian, which demonstrates just how much Morrison listens to brown people (never).

Carbon Tax

Fulfilling a grand total of one actual election promise, the Carbon Tax has left us temporarily (give it time). Given Steph is a climate change campaigner, it will not surprise you to learn she disagrees with our PM’s assessment of it as ‘toxic’, and that its abolishment will boost confidence.

Privacy and Spy Stuff

Although it’s pretty traditional to make fun of ASIS and ASIO, there’s some new stuff being proposed about data retention (which nope. Nope. I can barely be trusted to keep my own records, I don’t want others keeping it), ASIS’ ability to spy on Australians overseas without Ministerial approval (which makes me feel super safe), and compelling use of third-party computers (ie, people who aren’t under investigation).

The Great Barrier Reef

I am super pleased to tell you, via information provided by Environment Minister Greg Hunt, that Australia’s largest coal mine, recently approved and between us and the GBR, will not impact the Great Barrier Reef! The extra 450 large ships that will have to sail through the GBR to get there every year are totally negligible, and the high water use of coal mines will absolutely not impact the local marine areas. Handily, if this seems confusing, yesterday saw the triumphant return of Ian the Climate Denialist Potato at FDotM to explain the impacts of the mine and how it’s all totally okay and Greg’s a great guy.